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Never a big believer in setting up resolutions for the new year, I find myself in a strange predicament the second day into 2011.  It began normal enough, made breakfast for my boyfriend and son, followed by a science fair experiment that I left for the last minute of my son’s holiday break.  We (my son and I) dug into the project, which he picked out at his dad’s house and was expected to complete and my house. We have joint custody.

Throughout the experiment, my son and I worked diligently to get it done and record the results.  At this time, however, my allergies started acting up….enough to test my already short level of patience.  Much of the experiment results are based on creating a graph, which I attempted several times to create in Excel, but to no avail.  With my allergic spell getting worse, I started to get very frustrated and took it out on the experiment, my ex-husband, my boyfriend and my son.

Of course, who received the brunt of my annoyance, which has now turned into rage with the added nuisance of my head feeling like it is in a vice….my ex-husband.  He is an easy target.  Any divorced woman can always blame the ex-husband for basically everything.  I tend to not argue with him much, however today was an entirely different situation.  My son called him as he saw me struggling with the experiment and he (his dad) asked to speak to me directly.  I spouted out a lot of venom, at which point, he decided he would come and pick up my son to finish the experiment, which angered me more.

I decidedly took some Benadryl and immediately went to sleep, letting the men of the house clean up the mess (in more ways than one).   By the time I woke up, I had a sharp pain in my stomach.  It was that “oh man, what did I do?” feeling.  I decided to apologize to everyone involved, especially my ex-husband and make some real resolutions for me to work on in 2011.  Many of these not only work for personal growth, but also your growth as a small business:

Resolutions for 2011 for both personal and business:

 1. If you are wrong, admit it:

In the case of the science fair project gone awry, I was wrong on many levels.  I am going to make an effort to fix it, but I was wrong. Wrong. Wrong.

Many times in business, we find ourselves on the wrong side of what should have happened.  Admitting you’re wrong and not blaming everything else for the shortcomings shows real character.  Crying or using guilt in meetings is extremely inappropriate and unprofessional.  If you miss a deadline or simply didn’t do the task correctly, just own up to it and do your best to make it right.  (Oh, and try to avoid doing the wrong thing again).

2. Apologize and try to fix the situation:

Paul (my ex-husband), I am truly sorry.  You provided me with the materials and I simply fell short.   I handled the situation badly and I am thankful that you are a good enough father to attempt to fix the situation.  To my son, I am sorry, for letting the sickness turn me into  a  mommy monster, where I yelled and screamed and said a bunch of things I wish I hadn’t.  Adults aren’t perfect and I hope you know that mommy is far from perfect, but she tries her best to be a good person.   To my boyfriend, who also handled the situation very well, I am sorry to have put you in the middle of something that shouldn’t have concerned you, but in this case you rose to the occasion, and that quality will certainly get you brownie points with your lady.

I am not sure how to fix this particular situation, but I hope my heartfelt and very public apology helps.

Many times in business, we find ourselves in a situation where we have to own up to our own inadequacies and failures, and then also apologize to those in our wake.  Taking the blame for bad performance is not enough.  We also need to apologize to those affected by our lackluster behavior.

3. Patience is a Virtue:

I always jokingly tell my son “Patience is a virtue….that I don’t possess”.  I resolve this year to figure out how to find some patience.  Maybe I need to start taking yoga again or tai-chi or take some time to stop and smell the roses.  2010 was a whirlwind year where many of us didn’t have time to stop and enjoy the great things right in front of us.  I am going to make it a point to smell the roses a little more this year.

As a small business owner, I learned that being patient is very important.  Everything did not happen according to plan.  There were hiccups, changes in direction, competitors that try to psych me out…..I did not let any of these hinder my business resolve.  Failure is not an option, so I must patiently let the business grow by making smart decisions and simply focusing on my clients’ needs.  Build your business brick by brick with hard work and integrity.

4. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you:

Guilty as charged.  As a Latina, I am passionate and hot-tempered – this is no stereotype, this is simply the truth.  In the case of the bad science project, here is where I failed.  Not only was I dealing with sickness, but the second my blood got hot, it was all over.   Had I not let my emotions get the best of me, I would not have to sit here with my tail in between my legs apologizing now.

In reference to business, there are many times where the opportunity to let your blood boil may come to fruition.   We all face challenges, but it is how you react to those challenges that people make real judgments about you and your business.  Always handle yourself and your business with grace and integrity.

5. Stop procrastinating:

Stop blaming writers’ block, or any other excuse as to why you haven’t completed the task in a timely manner.  Just do it.  Get it over with and cross it off your list.  If you don’t have a list, you better start one.  Keep it with you and at the end of the day, you will find how successful you were throughout the day with all of your tasks crossed off.  If your list is still full, then you really need to examine what you are doing to waste your day.

6. Spread the Love:

Most importantly, spread the love as often as you can.   You get what you put out in this world.  This morning, I put out a lot of negativity and now I am walking around with this bad feeling in my gut. I try my best to be positive so that positivity comes back, but like I said earlier, I am not perfect, who is?  Although I don’t claim to be mother of the year, I certainly know my son is a great, sweet and loving kid and that can NOT be a mistake.  I must be doing SOMETHING right, even with my procrastinating, impatient, hot Latina tempered self.

I am making a genuine effort to keep up these 2011 resolutions.  If you see me out in social media, slipping up, I hope you will remind me to get back on track.

What are your resolutions this year?